Mental Health MinuteAre you Stuck? Part 4: Reconnect
By Lisa Elliott Schumacher, LPC
Welcome back to part four in this series on being “stuck” and the journey to getting “unstuck.” To recap, during part one of the series, we took 30 days to practice taking just 5 minutes each morning to REST, to check in with ourselves, to breathe deeply, and to take a thought inventory to better understand what we are carrying around with us that has us stuck. In part two, we talked about the second step in getting unstuck, and that was to RUN (towards what scares us), as fears are often at the root of “stuckness.” Part three took us to the topic of RELEASE. We worked on releasing thought patterns, the need to control outcomes, and mental contracts that no longer serve us. If you have been on this journey with us, you have probably already discovered so much about yourself, your mindsets, and your burdens, that you are hopefully now intrigued by the process, hopeful for change, and ready to go further. If you are new to the series, then welcome, and it is not too late to join in from here!
I want to talk to you in this edition about the concept of RECONNECTING. Imagine the concept of building a bridge over the Grand Canyon. In life, we stand at the edge of many canyons, able to SEE across but completely helpless to GET across to the other side.
Water is a powerful force able to give life but also take life, as we saw in the wake of Hurricane Helene. It can also create new geological formations such as a canyon. The storms of life can create canyons in our lives much the same. For example, the storm of the loss of a child can create a canyon of grief between a husband and wife who are grieving the loss so differently that they find themselves struggling to find a way across the canyon of disconnection and hurt brought about by their differences.
Others carry dreams for where they want to go in life with a career; yet, the canyon of “how” requires a bridge to get to the other side. Some may have experienced storms in their health due to a bout with cancer or other illnesses that have changed their fitness level and weight, and now they cannot see how they will ever reconnect with the healthier, fitter version of who they used to be.
Bridges…we need bridges to get across these canyons, to RECONNECT with dreams, create connections with one another and with self, with better health, with goals, and so many other things that seem so out of reach. Those canyons appear to keep us STUCK.
Building bridges takes multiple people with different expertise. Even within the field of engineering, multiple types of engineers are employed to help in the construction of a safe and sturdy bridge. Structural engineers are responsible for assessing load-bearing capacity and all of the stresses the bridge will incur over time. Geotechnical engineers are responsible for assessing soil types and thereby what types of piers and anchors are needed. Environmental engineers assess the impact of the new structure on the world around it. Hydraulic engineers will be consulted to assess the impact of water nearby or potential future erosion. If you lived in middle Georgia in 1994, you certainly remember the bridges washing out and collapsing. Although the bridges were secure on a normal day, they could not withstand the extreme amounts of rain from Tropical Storm Alberto. Not everything can be predicted or prevented, but a good plan always includes a multidisciplinary team. No one person has all the answers, and no one discipline exists in a vacuum.
The step of RECONNECTING is a step of community. If you are trying to build a relational bridge and you don’t know how to do it, think about who you can talk to that can put tools of wisdom in your hands? Perhaps your pastor is a good resource. Perhaps, a counselor who is passionate about relational repair can be helpful. If your canyon is the lack of knowledge of how to build that business you’ve been dreaming of, maybe you can consult with someone you know who has made their way in the realm of entrepreneurship. If you don’t know anyone like that, think about your favorite local business, and offer to take the owner to lunch in exchange for gleaning some of their wisdom or, you can always find consulting services online.
If you are staring at the canyon of fitness or wellness, there are many personal trainers, health coaches, and wellness consultants, as well as physicians that may be able to help. If you have tried that and it didn’t work, try again. Hire someone new. Don’t give up. Your answers are out there, and your bridge can be built with the right team.
There are many, many ways to build a bridge over a canyon, but every manner of building will include a team. Reconnecting yourself to the other side of that canyon includes reconnecting yourself with others. It includes embracing the humility and the vulnerability of admitting you need help.
As we learn to open up to others, to work together, and to learn from one another, we also bless others. The mentors we seek wisdom from are blessed to impart out of their own struggle the shortcuts and hard-earned pro tips that we very much need to possess. One person’s need can be another person’s blessing. If you are standing at the edge of a canyon and you feel stuck, consider how you can begin to RECONNECT with the dreams and goals, to RECONNECT with others to build that bridge across the canyon, and know that it will be a process. No bridge was built in a day. Embrace your process, reach out, and enjoy watching your bridge take shape in community!
Let’s practice RECONNECTING together as this fourth step in the journey, and let’s see what we uncover within our beautiful, quirky, complex, unique selves that the world is waiting for, and let’s step out onto the road of getting unstuck!!
Progress and growth are always better in community. So, if you are interested in growing together, head over to my FB page and follow me there and we’ll follow along with one another for the next 30 days on this journey to practicing reconnecting and building bridges. To do this, simply use the QR code below to locate my page and let’s go!
Lisa Elliott Schumacher, LPC
Life By Design Counseling
Lisa is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), a Monroe County resident, and a mental health practitioner who is passionate about helping others find their purpose, live fully, and to live holistically healthy lives, body, soul, and spirit. She believes life is meant to be lived by design, not by chance, and she aspires to help others live by design, wholly, fully, and vibrant. The sharing of these thoughts is in no way therapy or a substitute for therapy. If you are in crisis right now…Call or Text 988 or visit 988lifeline.org. If you are having a medical emergency, a safety emergency requiring law enforcement, EMS, or experiencing a fire emergency: DIAL 911.
